Spreading Faster than H1N1

Shades in the club? = Certified FUCK BOY


We interrupt our regularly scheduled blog so that I may speak on a subject I unfortunately know far too much about: FUCK NIGGAS....Come on folks ! We all know one, or two, or a dozen of em! Whether you call em fuck-boy, chumps, suckas, or douches, they all boil down to the same characteristics.

Urban Dictionary has the most succint definition I have found: a person who think they are the shit or just simply better than what they really are....couldn't have said it better myself. But see, the problems some of you, especially my ladies out there,is you don't know HOW to spot a "fuck nigga".Fuck nigga-ness does not have any age restriction. IT does not target a specific race or population of people. In fact, it does not even target a specific sex over the other. THATS RIGHT LADIES! YOUR HOMEGIRL COULD BE A FUCK NIGGA TOO! Oh yes, the "fuck nigga" can be a cunning beast indeed!

So, with a major assist by my homeboy Wendell, here are tell-tell signs that you have a fuck nigga amongst your midst...

1. If you can sit thru an entire movie like Rosewood, Glory, or Roots without wanting to take to the streets and go Nat Turner or Catcher Freeman on a bitch, then you probably a "fuck nigga"....

2.If your motto is: It Aint Trickin if you Got it, you probably a "fuck nigga"...now I know some of you ladies may disagree with this one but lets speak on that for a minute, shall we? If the only reason why you with dude in the 1st place is because he buys you nice shit, but you can't stand to be around his ass otherwise, well guess what?! That qualifies you as "AINT SHIT" and instantly puts you in "fuck nigga" category too....Do NOT pass go!! Do NOT collect $200. Moving along....

3.If you race home after work, NOT to start dinner or check your kids homework, but instead to catch BET's 106 and Park, then you probably a "fuck nigga" ( see ladies, I didnt forget about some of you!) ....

4. If you catch up on the daily news events at Bossip, Sandra Rose, Necole Bitchie and MediaTakeOut instead of CNN, or your local news, you guessed it! You probably a "fuck nigga"...

5.Fellas, if you care more about what YOU are wearing that paying that 9-month in arrears, $100/month child support payment, you are DEFINITELY a "fuck nigga"...

6. If your registered as a black republican than your probably--no fuck that! Go hang yourself, because there is no hope for you! You'll die as a part of the "Fuck Nigga Hall of Fame" ...

7. If you call all your homeys over the weekend and everyone always seems to be busy or got shit to do that doesn't include you, yep, your a "fuck nigga"...

8. If you constantly fighting your kids for their Lil Boosie, Souljah Boy, Drake and Young Money CD because yall have the SAME musical taste, then you are probably a " fuck nigga"...

9. FELLAS: if you ever type LOL :), even to your GIRL, you are and always will be a "fuck nigga"...and probably a little gay...which leads me to my last "fuck-nigga" characteristic.

10. If you own or have ever THOUGHT about rocking a pair of skinny jeans, then you my friend, are a "fuck nigga"!


Please feel free to leave me your list in the comment section below....

11. And one bonus one: Fellas if you purchased a Trey Songz album, not for your girl, but you instead, ...you guessed it....shaking my damn head....